GUARD YOUR HEART, SIS.

As a single woman, one of the most important things you can learn is how to guard your heart.

Not because love is dangerous.

Not because every man is bad.

Not because you should become cold, suspicious, or emotionally unavailable.

But because your heart is valuable.

The Bible says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” — Proverbs 4:23

Sometimes we give access to our hearts long before someone has earned the responsibility of holding them.

A few sweet messages.

A little attention.

Late-night calls.

“Good morning, beautiful.”

A few compliments.

A couple of dates.

And suddenly, we've emotionally married someone who has never actually asked us to be his girlfriend.

Sis, attention is not commitment.

Chemistry is not character.

Promises are not consistency.

And potential is not a relationship.

Guard your heart by learning to observe before you attach.

Don't fall in love with what someone could become. Pay attention to who they are right now.

Don't give boyfriend privileges to someone who has only offered you friendship.

Don't allow someone to occupy your mind every day when they have made no clear intention to occupy a legitimate place in your life.

And don't confuse someone's ability to make you feel special with their willingness to treat you with honor.

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Guarding your heart also means learning to say no.

No to situationships that keep you confused.

No to relationships that constantly compromise your values.

No to secret relationships that cannot stand in the light.

No to someone who only comes around when they are lonely.

No to being someone's emotional support system while they remain unwilling to give you clarity.

No to staying because you're afraid you won't find someone else.

And especially, no to lowering your standards simply because you're tired of waiting.

Being single is not a season where you stop protecting your heart. It's a season where you learn what deserves access to it.

You don't have to entertain every person who shows interest in you.

You don't have to respond to every DM.

You don't have to give everyone a chance just because they are interested.

And you don't have to feel guilty for walking away from something that doesn't align with your values, convictions, and vision for marriage.

But here's something important:

Guarding your heart doesn't mean building walls around it.

It means building wisdom around it.

You can remain soft without being naive.

You can be loving without being desperate.

You can be hopeful without being gullible.

You can desire marriage without allowing the desire for marriage to make you tolerate anything.

And you can pray for a husband while still having enough discernment to reject the wrong man.

Sis, don't let loneliness make decisions that wisdom should make.

Don't let the fear of growing older make you rush into something God never asked you to enter.

And don't let the fact that everyone around you seems to be getting married convince you that you're behind.

Your singleness is not a punishment.

Use this season to grow.

Heal.

Build your relationship with God.

Understand yourself.

Develop your purpose.

Learn healthy communication.

Understand your boundaries.

Become emotionally mature.

And most importantly, learn to recognize the kind of love that is worthy of your heart.

Because when the right person comes, you shouldn't have to abandon your convictions just to keep them.

You shouldn't have to beg for clarity.

You shouldn't have to compete for basic respect.

You shouldn't have to shrink yourself to become lovable.

Guard your heart, sis. 

Not because you are afraid of love.

But because you understand that love is too precious to give carelessly.

And when the time comes, give your heart to someone who doesn't merely know how to make you feel loved, but someone who knows how to love you responsibly.

Loveleaf — Towards Godly and Healthy Relationships 

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